Here's two new monsters, a god, and a new artifact for the Umerica setting I created. Comments welcome!
Orginal artwork by artist Nate Marcel who did the cover for the Umerican Survival Guide among others. And many thanks to Daniel J. Bishop for the creature comments!
Fire Aunt
So vast was their scorn that it’s said that they once condemned a priest of Petrolex to death for riding his red sports car into their settlement. (The noise scared their farm animals.) So, the God of Fuel and Fire in a fit of rage cursed the women into undead and flame. So, the undead women either as individuals or as swarms wander the Southern parts of Umerica burning and killing as they see fit. Areas where there are large numbers of beast of burden and cars are favorite objects of theirs.
The pile of tattered clothes and bones abruptly stirs, rising up to take on a human shape and explodes into red-orange flame. Its elongated, bony fingers reach out to scratch at the living, blazing with unceasing fire.
Fire aunt: Init +0; Atk claw +1 melee (1d3); AC 10; Armor die 1d3; HD 2d6; MV 30’; Act 1d20; SP un-dead, fiery aspect, fiery doom, nasty harangue, half damage from piercing and slashing weapons; SV Fort +0, Ref +0, Will +3; AL C.
Fiery aspect: Creatures adjacent to a fire aunt take 1d5 points of fire damage at the start of their turn. Anyone striking a burning skeleton with an unarmed strike or natural attack takes 1d6 points of fire damage.
Fiery doom: A fire aunt explodes into a burst of flame when it dies. Anyone adjacent to the fire aunt when it is destroyed takes 1d5 points of fire damage. A Reflex save (DC 8) halves this damage.
Nasty harangue: A fire aunt uses its voice to cause one or more creatures to become furious with it. Each creature to be harangued must be within 90 feet, able to see, hear, and understand the fire aunt, and capable of paying attention to it. The fire aunt must also be able to see the creatures affected. Each creature within range receives a Will save (DC 8) to negate the effect. If a creature’s saving throw succeeds, the fire aunt cannot successfully mock that creature for 24 hours. While the fire aunt keeps haranguing, the creature takes a –2 penalty on all attack rolls and skill checks until it has successfully attacked the fire aunt with a melee or ranged attack, or has harmed the creature with a spell that deals damage.
More deadly are the groups of fire aunts who work together to expand the ghoulish presence of death and fire. These horrid creatures act as one and clamber over each other to claw at their prey.
Fire aunt swarm:Init +3; Atk claw +6 melee (2d7); AC 14; Armor die 1d5; HD 12d6; MV 30’; Act 2d20; SP un-dead, fiery aspect; fiery doom; claws attack all targets within 30’ x 30’ space, swarm traits, half damage from piercing and slashing weapons; SV Fort +4, Ref +4, Will +8; AL C.
A fire aunt swarm loses its directed nasty harangue because once together they can't agree on who deserves contempt. But the swarm still creates a continual vexing buzz that grants a -2 penalty on initiative rolls for creatures within 90 feet, able to see, hear, and understand the fire aunts, and capable of paying attention to it.
But they'll work together to burn forests or cross rivers.
The fire aunt swarm takes up a 30’ x 30’ space and inflicts its claw damage on every creature within that space.
Swarm traits: Because the fire aunt swarm is composed of many individual elements, it takes half damage from normal weapons and any spell or effect that normally has an individual target.
Fiery aspect: Creatures adjacent to a fire aunt take 2d8 points of fire damage at the start of their turn. Anyone striking a fire aunt swarm with an unarmed strike or natural attack takes 1d7 points of fire damage.
Fiery doom: A fire aunt explodes into a burst of flame when it dies. Anyone adjacent to the fire aunt when it is destroyed takes 2d8 points of fire damage. A Reflex save (DC 14) halves this damage.
New God
The Cool One (neutral)(Chaotic tendencies)
In in old Urth, the territory southeast of Whistling Marshes was known as Hoosier Land. Years before the Great Cataclysm, the Cool One was an old Urth movie star who was born in Hoosier Land. It was said that the soil of Hoosier Land was the source of his strength. For centuries he was worshiped by the young people of old Urth who put black and white posters of him in their rooms. When the Great Cataclysm came, his followers watched his movies and prayed to him for protection. This allowed him to ascend to godhood. The Cool one didn’t star in many films but is beloved. He is said to be moody even by his followers.
Deanes is the god of cool, teenagers and movies. It is hard to define the tenants of the Cool one for it’s said that any attempt to define cool changes it. As the god of cool, he has some effect on the weather around him and can produce frost upon command. But he is known to scorn the bitter cold of the far north and extreme heat of the Wastelands. He is said to drive an Urth Porsche Spyder with a movie screen strapped to the back. The Cool One wears a spotless red zip up jacket, a white tee shirt, (no matter what the weather) and worn blue jeans. A lit old Urth brand cigarette is often found in his mouth.
Deanes is neutral but is known to have a Chaotic bent because of his disdain for authority. He enjoys the company of the Chaotic god, the Demon King of Speed, because of his fondness for race cars. He’s also known to avoid strict authority figures. However, he has an active sense of measured morality when it comes to his friends and followers. The Cool One has a strong following among Feral Urchins. (Except Nerds!)
In present day Hoosier Land, the town of Fairs Mountain which was the site of his old Urth grave (before the Great Cataclysm) is the site of a large shrine to the Cool One. Inside the shrine, there’s an extensive gift shop which sells (among other items) DVDs and VHS tapes of his old Urth movies, Rebellion without an Objective, Gigantic and West of the Garden of Eden. His followers gather each year, to drive fast cars, smoke old Urth cigarettes and watch movies away from the strict supervision of their parents. His older followers don’t acknowledge that they’ve grown up and join in the fun. (They want to be cool after all!)
The Tenets of the Cool One.
You don't have to explain anything to anybody.
Don’t be chicken.
Use your free will.
Don’t seek trouble but be brave.
Seek relief from confusion and shame.
Watch my movies and make copies for new followers.
Be loyal to your close friends.
Weapons of Choice The Cool One seeks to avoid conflict but, when necessary, his follows will use small knives such as old Urth switch blades or staves when confronted.
Unholy Creatures Undead, slow drivers, nerds, demons, strict authority figures and beasts of burden.
Special Rules
Priests of Deanes gain a bonus equal to their level on Personality checks to diffuse conflicts. Once per day, they may add 1d3 cold damage to a single attack.
Stay cool! Clerics of Deanes value peace contemplation and fast cars. They like to sit and smoke a cigarette. Sacrifices might be uncool items from the clerics community or horn rim glasses, small calculators and pocket protectors.
Pliers of Petee (artifact)
Santa the giving god, is known to employ elves (gnomes) as workers to make toys. Ages ago, so the legends say that one such elf, Petee was known to be an eccentric. He decided that he was fed up with toy production. Disgusted by all the cavities and gum disease caused by the high sugar diet of Santa's elves, Petee decided to do something about it. Being the eccentric elf that he was, Petee decided to become a periodontist and promote good dental hygiene and gum care at the North Pole. Scorned by his fellow elves and armed with his dental pliers, he set out on a quest to become a periodontist.
Along the way he met a crazed miner and an oddball caribou. When the group was threatened by an oversized yeti, Petee using his prized dental pliers saved the day! Eventually, the group returned to Santa’s workshop and were welcomed back. Petee was “allowed” to pursue his career as a periodontist. Over decades it is said, that his pliers were enchanted with robust magic by the giving god. However, the pliers were lost years ago and followers of Santa are known to seek the return of this fascinating dental tool.
Pliers of Petee: These oversized mithril pliers (for an elf (gnome/halfling, normal sized for a human or dwarf) when used by a follower of the giving god, have the following powers: Healing 2/day - heals 1d6+1 hit points of damage and grants the wieldier a +2 saving throw vs the harmful effects of cold weather. The pliers don’t normally function as a weapon but versus yetis (and wielded by a gnome/halfling) cause 1d10 points of damage.
When used by a creature of Chaotic alignment or a naughty person, they must make a DC 20 Will Save or permanently change their alignment to Law. Even on a successfully save the pliers burn their naughty hands for 3d6 damage and their name is forever inscribed on the giving gods naughty list.
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